Sharing Resonance – Active Listening:

While listening to a story, notice the moments during the story when you feel most engaged by what you hear.

Prompt: Share back with the storyteller the MOMENTS in their story where you felt right there with them. E.g. “I resonated with the moment where you and your family were having an argument over dinner one night.”

Hint: they may have been the moments when you felt almost as if it was happening to YOU! Those are the moments when you are most connected with the storyteller.

Why Resonate?

Sharing resonance is a gift to a storyteller. It lets them know what parts of their story are the most humanizing for both of you, supporting connection through vulnerability and empathy both ways.

Sharing resonance is an intentional somatic practice like meditation that requires shared responsibility and discipline. Group members should support one another to stay engaged while listening and keep to the guidelines.

Sharing Resonance is NOT:

Making Meaning

Aka interpretation (“From your story it sounds like you were actually depressed”)

Asking Questions

(“So how old was your mom when she had you?”)

Telling your Own Story

(“That reminds me of … ” Resonator launches into their own story and forgets they are resonating.)


(“I don’t think you should share that” “You know you really should consider skydiving!”)


(“You think that’s bad, listen to what happened to ME!”)

If you catch yourself doing any of these, CONGRATULATIONS!

This means you are becoming more aware of habits that interfere with resonance!

Hint: If you’re not sure whether you’re doing any of the above, you can keep to the storyteller’s own words when sharing the MOMENT.

If you find yourself drifting while listening, it might be because you are doing one of the above. Once again, great noticing!

Adapted from Relational Public Narrative (The Relational Center 2015}